You CAN Buy Love, But Only With Credit Cards

Posted by Todd Blankenship

“Will this be the snow that sticks around?”, the man thought to himself as he grouchily scraped the snowy ice (or is it icy snow?) off his car windows. Excited to get back home after a long day, he scraped a bare minimum amount off the windows and quickly jumped into the driver’s seat, throwing the scraper on the floor. A tiny yellow light caught his attention. “Gas!”, he yelped in dismay as the light heckled him. Continue reading

How I Saved My Wife’s Life

Posted by Todd Blankenship

It was a cold day in January and our refrigerator was low on many of the key food groups. In fact, the cupboard looked a bit bare too. And so, together, Tina and I packed up the little one and headed out to our usual grocery store to pick up a few things.

Along the way, we said hello to the mailman, something we almost NEVER do. To be honest with you, I’m not sure what our letter carrier even looks like, so to say it was a mailMAN is an inadvertent judgement on my part. Apologies, apologies all around. Continue reading

Birth Plans Are Meant To Be Broken

I’m watching her sleep in the hospital bed. Wires and tubes cover her body as I recount to myself the Star Wars inspired joke I made earlier “You’re more machine than woman now.”

Though we knew that flexibility in the birth plan was essential, I don’t think Tina and I fully understood, before embarking on this journey, the amplitude of the events that awaited us at the hospital.

Continue reading

The Way the Cookie Crumbles

Posted by Tina Blankenship

If you are reading this post, then I can reasonably assume that you are familiar with old school Sesame Street. If that is indeed the case, then you have certainly seen the iconic sketch where serious and stern Bert loses his mind when he catches lovable goofball Ernie eating cookies in bed. Now, 6 year old Tina wouldn’t DREAM of siding with Bert on this issue. However, now that I’m an adult, I hate to admit it, but I do see the validity in his argument.

I’ll be the first to admit that I enjoy a little bedtime snack from time to time. It’s a guilty pleasure that Todd and I occasionally allow. Recently, Todd has made snacking in bed more of a habit. At first it didn’t bother me, but as his nightly snacks became more elaborate, it began to gnaw at me. I kept my mouth shut for a few days, reminding myself that there were worst things he could be doing. 

 The other night I was across the hall in our bathroom going about my evening routine. I could hear Todd chewing and laughing at Jimmy Fallon’s monologue. When I came in, I fumbled around in the dark until I found the edge of the bed. As I lifted up the covers to get in, my hand was suddenly engulfed by something squishy and wet! “Ew!”, I cried as I turned on the light to examine the mystery substance. It was tuna! I looked at Todd and asked why there was Tuna on my side of the bed? He laughed and said, “I thought I might have dropped some, but when I couldn’t find it, I thought I was imagining it.” That may have been enough of an explanation for him, but that was were I drew the line!

Henceforth, only dry foods like chips, nuts, crackers, and of course cookies are allowed in our bed.