Oh fuzzy, plush, maker of white noise. You, who echo the ocean, whales, the rain, and the human heart, have made your way into my mine. (My heart, that is.)
I’m watching her sleep in the hospital bed. Wires and tubes cover her body as I recount to myself the Star Wars inspired joke I made earlier “You’re more machine than woman now.”
Though we knew that flexibility in the birth plan was essential, I don’t think Tina and I fully understood, before embarking on this journey, the amplitude of the events that awaited us at the hospital.
If you are reading this post, then I can reasonably assume that you are familiar with old school Sesame Street. If that is indeed the case, then you have certainly seen the iconic sketch where serious and stern Bert loses his mind when he catches lovable goofball Ernie eating cookies in bed. Now, 6 year old Tina wouldn’t DREAM of siding with Bert on this issue. However, now that I’m an adult, I hate to admit it, but I do see the validity in his argument.
Recently, I have taken up the unfortunate habit of vomiting every morning (or as Todd says, shouting at the toilet.) I can’t seem to get through a day without napping, and my mood has begun to swing out of control. It turns out that Todd and I are expecting our first child! Continue reading
Christmas is fast approaching and as per usual I am left with a whole laundry list of things to do before it gets here. I only just got around to decorating the tree, I still have a few gifts to buy, wrap, and deliver. I also have some baking to do, and some appetizers to make too! Needless to say, with a week left until the big day, I’m starting to feel a little pressure.
Hi. My name is Tina, and I’m an arachnophobic. My affliction has affected my life in the following ways: I am unable to come within 3 feet of a spider without becoming temporarily frozen with fear. If a spider is somehow upon my person, I will scream and flail about involuntarily until the threat is dispatched. I have sullied the covers of many a heavy encyclopedia, dictionary, and best selling novel with spider carcasses by strategically positioning the book above the arachnid and dropping it. This is really the only way that I can assassinate them myself without having a total melt down. Most recently, my phobia had prevented me from donning my winter boots.